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  1. The Honeymoon and the Dragon Mom

    October 2, 2012 by Laura

    I have a con­fes­sion. I am self­ish.  I real­ized just how self­ish I am on Sun­day.  It had been a long week with my hubs gone– there were the usual crazy Plane Jane moments (like my 1.5 year old shav­ing a chunk out of his hair)

     

    and the won­der­ful moments that you are so dev­as­tated your part­ner wasn’t there to wit­ness (like my goof­ball kids danc­ing thier lit­tle hearts out to a junior high ‘garage band’ practice).

    So when Sun­day rolled around and it was the first glo­ri­ous day the whole fam­ily was together again I was soooooo relieved.  We spent a quiet day around the house, my hubs and I were “recon­nect­ing” in all the ways mar­ried cou­ples do- things were really ,really amaz­ing. I was feel­ing so blessed and so grate­ful all day.

    Until the last part of the evening when for what­ever rea­son my focus shifted.  Instead of see­ing all of the won­der­ful funny things my kids were cre­at­ing, or feel­ing glad that my hus­band was able to rest while I had a kitchen full of food to make for dinner…all I could hear was whin­ing, all I could see was the mess, all I wanted was for some­one to help ME.  I am seri­ous when I tell you that it was like a dragon pos­sessed my body and I instantly was cranky, irri­ta­ble and short- with every­one.  I am SOOO not proud of how I was acting…so after I lit­er­ally swat­ted my husband’s hand away as he tried to show me some lovin’ it was all over.  My mood­i­ness ruined my honeymoon. The end of the won­der­ful day was poopy because mom decided to see the crap instead of the glory.  I know this is NOT the first time I have done this…in fact it is a bit of a pat­tern with me…I am fine, fine, fine and then whamo– the house is a disaster, I burn din­ner, the kids are cry­ing and out comes Dragon Mom.

    I had to remove myself for a minute to seri­ously give my self a talk­ing too. I asked myself what the real prob­lem was…answer…nothing.  So I asked myself why I was upset…and I real­ized it was because I stopped see­ing the won­der and started focus­ing on the struggle. We are inher­ently self­ish people…from day one every­thing is mine, mine, mine and me, me, me. I am really work­ing on being grate­ful and more self-less as I get to spend more time with my kids.  It is hard as moms because the job is never end­ing– the clean­ing, the wip­ing, the calm voice all the time…but I really saw such an evi­dent shift in my entire fam­ily dynamic when my mood changed that it struck me how respon­si­ble I really am for their well­be­ing. So my lit­tle melt­downs, while they may be justified, are just me being self­ish, and how can I tell my kids to be patient with one another and stop throw­ing fits when dragon mom over here is los­ing it?!?!

    The good news of course is that I have an incred­i­bly for­giv­ing fam­ily. But, I am REALLY try­ing to har­ness this dragon of mine so no to ruin the hon­ey­moon next time.

     

    What turns you into a dragon mom?  Or, shoot, am I the only one;)

     

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